Kiara Shanay Lee, PhD
Part of the Girlhood Series at The House of Psalm Magazine
My mom told me she once saw me playing with a broom when I was about 5 years old. I was sweeping (and had been sweeping) with it all week actually, playing “house” with my imaginary friends (I know, I know — the imaginary friends thing is a different subject for a different article).
I wasn’t playing with much else. I was just a girl — tidying up and keeping my “home” above board if you will, assuming the identity of a 40 year old housewife — at age 5. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being a housewife, but a girl playing as if that was the only play choice at age 5 is something entirely different.
My mom took the broom out of my hand and redirected me to the intentional, wide range of toys and playthings she and my father bought for me with great intention. Things like wooden blocks, a train set, Hot Wheels cars, a doll collection with dolls of all styles and colors, an electric car track that had to be built from the ground up, Tonka dump trucks and so many other things that required much more than the stroke of a broom. (I repeat, there’s nothing wrong with sweeping, playing house or aspiring to be a housewife, but one thing — no matter what that one thing is — should never be a child’s only possibility.)
I’ve heard this story quite a few times, but I must say, it hits different being a girl mom myself now. I was a little girl who loved to create, to build things and to run things — and I see the same in my own daughter, Psalm, who this platform was named after. And ever since, I (like my parents had done with me) try to be intentional, providing a broad variety of play options that are not dictated by gender or by anything else. At our house, trying new things, building new things and getting messy while doing it is all part of the program. Toys are so much more than just toys, possibilities are endless and toys and activities traditionally marked to boys are not off limits. My girl is a little creative and most of the time, she creates without inhibition.
But, for many little girls, this is simply not the case. According to LEGO Ready for Girls Creativity Study and the Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media, about 60% of young girls hold themselves to a standard of perfection, which stops them from trying out their creative ideas during play. Along with that stat, it was also found that about every 2 out of 3 girls age 5-12 hold back from sharing their creative ideas out of fear of messing up. These stats are telling us something: young girls often feel safer minimizing their creative play than they do embracing it.
Little girls need the confidence to create and to play. If we continue to keep them cooped up in the ‘playing house’ box, then they’ll remain closed out of the realms boys often take for granted, for good.
They need to have a chance to thrash monster trucks together and to enjoy the loud, clanging sound they make. They should be able to turn the playground into an airplane, as they transform into a pilot after school. They should have an opportunity to turn old boxes into new robots. Little girls everywhere should have the chance to be out of this world, to be other-worldly and to believe the world is theirs, all at the same time — and they shouldn’t feel too small to do so.
This one is for the little girls — may they be seen, heard, given space and given endless possibilities. And for the grown-ups: today is the perfect day to let girls be girls — innovative, bold, daring and most of all, creative.
Today is the perfect day for us to do our part, for all the little girls out there.
Whether you’re a writer, a painter, an actress, or if you don’t consider any fancy titles for yourself – you are a creative. No matter who you are, to some degree, we all create and we all need space to take care of every part of ourselves. I hope The House of Psalm Magazine inspires you to take good care.
Dr. Kiara Shanay Lee | Editor in Chief, The House of Psalm Magazine
IG: @thehouseofpsalm | kiara@thehouseofpsalm.com
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